We Went to the Zoo Today

It was 75* today, in march! I couldn't believe it.

We called up a couple of friends and headed down for a day in the sun with the monkeys.

Of course whether monkeys refers to the gorillas, orangutans, and five other species of primate currently housed at the zoo or the 7 children we had with us is kind of in the eye of the beholder.

We must of looked like a herd of some type traipsing through the park with 1 double stroller, two single, a wagon, 4 mommies, and seven children who rarely rode in said strollers or wagon. I think the reason that moms become so attached to their strollers is not because of the convenience of pushing children. Really it is all the children's stuff that ends up riding.

And man do children need a lot of stuff. In my bag (on my stroller) I always carry diapers, pull-ups, wipes, purell, desitin, lotion, chap stick, band aids, the "leash" **, snacks for Dot, snacks for Googie, a binky for each, a sippy cup for each, toys for Dot, a small blanket for Dot, and sometimes one for Googie if we're going to be gone during nap time. Then, because of the outing today, we added sack lunches, extra water bottles, sunscreen, summer hats, my camera, loveys for each, and a large blanket to nurse with.

A small note on the leash . . . I am not one of those horrible parents who chain their children to the stroller so that they don't have to pay attention to where said children wander too. When Googie was 12 months old she started running. Running away from me. At speeds so great that I would have to sprint to catch her, and if I took my eyes off her for a second (ie. blinked) she would be gone. I have had more than one experience of sheer terror because she was just gone. So I bought the leash, and it set the boundaries that at 12 months old she couldn't understand when I tried to explain them to her. We haven't actually used the thing for at least 6 months. But I always have it with me, and it works as a great threat. If she starts running away, not listening, or being otherwise two, all I have to do is pull it out and threaten to strap it to her wrist and she immediately repents of all her wrongs and stays right by my side.

Returning now back to the Zoo . . .

Googie loves the Zoo. When I asked her this morning if she wanted to go she said, " a yions, a bears, a z-bra, a hort-sie, a yion, a monkey, a yion, a hort-sie, a z-bra, a . . . Sissy, 'ou 'anna see da moon-ky, yeah???!!! ALRIGHT!!!!" When she was repeating all the animals she wanted to see she was stuttering a little bit. She was so excited she couldn't think straight. It was so cute. Watching her little mind be so excited she couldn't formulate a complete thought, you could see the wheels turning in her head as she absently repeated the animals over and over until she figured out what she was really trying to say. And she always asks her sister for her permission about everything. And sissy always says yeah, especially if Googie wants her too.

We went. We saw. I screamed "STOP!", "SLOW", "GOOGIE MARIE!!! I SAID STOP!!!!" She ran. Dot slept. All in all it was a good day.

The best part of the whole day was when we got back to the car. It was hot in there. I rolled down the windows, no children were burned. Then Googie said "Momma I da Yuck." Thinking the worst I immediately assumed she'd had an accident. I started into the "Googie, you know better, you go potty on the toilet" speech when she said "No momma, a back, I da yuck, I wet" I don't know if I cracked up laughing from the sheer relief that she didn't have an accident or because of how darn cute she is.

The whole ride home she kept telling me over and over again "Momma, I da yuck. Whaaaa HA HA HA!!!" She thinks she's so funny . . .

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Just Thought You'd Like to Know . . .

Dot is back to a fairly normal BM schedule. At least she's not crying. But that still doesn't slove my problem of what started the whole issue. We are on breastmilk and pear juice. That's it. Maybe in the next week or so I'll be brave enough to try something else, but until then . . .

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Googie is the most adorable human in the world. I had to cut her nails today and she hates hates it when I cut her nails (This may have something to do with my tendency to cut them too short, or possibly knick the skin next to her nail . . . the jury is still out. I try to be careful, it just happens sometimes. And there is such a fine line between just right and too short on her little finger nails . . . Not only that, but she hates sitting still for anything, so that just makes the whole process harder). I have to cut her nails. What choice do I have?

I strap her down with one arm and hold her hand out with the other, and with my third functioning arm . . . oh wait, I don't have a third . . . with the hand attached to the arm holding the struggling two year old, I cut her nails. I actually did a really good job today, I think I missed one corner, but we didn't have any cut to short, or knicked skin. I release Googie. She grabbed the clippers out of my hand and said "A momma's turn, A momma's turn." Then she jabbed the sharp end of the baby clippers right into my finger.

"Oww baby that hurts."
"Oh, sorry momma"

Then she grabs my next finger and the process is repeated until I've had enough and take the clippers away.

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Another Posr About Poop, What an Exciting Life I Lead

I think I'm oversensitive to Dot's bowel movements. But it's not my fault. We went through 18 very emotionally (and physically for Googie) exhausting months of severe chronic constipation before I finally diagnosed a milk allergy. Now with Dot . . . well it's just hard to know.

Today for the first time, Dot had semi-hard stools. They weren't nearly as big as I remember Googie's being, or hard, but I'm not sure I remember what Googie's were like right at the beginning. Dot's were definitely thicker than peanut butter, and they were "concentrated." That over-powering disgusting smell completely took me back two years, and I felt like I was watching Googie suffer all over again. My stomach was in knots immediately.

So now what? I don't want to call the doctor because I know exactly what the nurse will say. "Put her on a high fiber diet, no rice cereal, bananas, or apples. Give her lots of prunes, pear juice, and maybe add a little bran to her cereal. If your really anxious about it you can dissolve a little white sugar in some water and give her that." Then when I call back a week later and say it's not working they'll tell me I haven't been sticking to it strictly enough.

The thing that I don't understand is I thought breastfed babies weren't supposed to get constipated. Yes I started her on real food, but she is only eating one meal a day. She's been doing that for the last 2 months. Why the change all the sudden, why now? We haven't added any new foods lately. It's been the same three as always. This is the exact same age that Googie started having her problems. I assumed it was because we started her on formula. Dot hasn't had any formula. None. And I don't think she could be getting enough dairy through my breast milk to all the sudden start having problems. It just doesn't make sense. Why now? My diet hasn't changed, and neither has hers.

Maybe Googie doesn't really have a problem with milk. Maybe it's something else. Maybe at 27 weeks old my babies magically become hypersensitive to dairy. Or maybe they have some other problem that eliminating milk helps, but it doesn't solve the issue.

I just do not want to go through this again. I've done it once, so hopefully I'm smarter now. But who knows? Maybe we haven't solved Googie's problem yet. Maybe it's two completely different things they just happen to develop the problem at the exact same age.

The only good thing about the whole situation is I'm still breast-feeding Dot. So we're going back to an exclusive breast milk diet. That was an option I didn't have with Googie. But still. I'm dreading the next couple of weeks. She has an appointment in 10 days. If the pear juice and breast milk hasn't fixed the problem by then, I'll have to convince the doctor that this is serious.

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I am getting some sleep! YES!

Finally, we're all getting some sleep around here. Dot is sleeping for at least 5 hours straight every night, and it only took a week! I am truly amazed, but doctors really do know what they're talking about some of the time.

At Dot's 4 month appointment, we talked extensively about her insistence to be up every 2-3 hours during the night. Which, in turn, was waking Googie up at least twice a night. Not a fun deal.

I never had to deal with this sort of thing with Googie. She decided she was ready to sleep for 12-14 hours a night at 3 weeks old. She had no arguments from me. Now with Dot, I was at a loss. I didn't know how to handle it, or how to promote sleep.

My Doctor told me to just try and push back her feedings an hour at a time every couple of nights. Just get her back to sleep however we need to as long as it doesn't involve food.

The first she woke up at 12, I put her back to sleep. Then she woke up at 1, and I fed her. Then she ws up at 3, I put her back to sleep. Up at 4, and I fed her. Up at 6 and I put her back to sleep. So I got up at 12, 1, 3, 4, 6. And when Dot was ready to wake up at 7, I was exhausted. But I figured it was just the first night, the second would be better. It wasn't. I was up 5 times again, and twice Googie woke up and it took me a half an hour to get her back to sleep. I got a total of maybe 4.5 hours of sleep; in 30-60 min intervals. NOT FUN!!!

I was ready to give up, but I thought I'd just give it a third night and if there was no improvement I was done. But that third night she didn't wake up until 3, I put her back to sleep without feeding her and she slept until 5! I couldn't believe it was actually working! Then the fourth night didn't even wake up until 5.

Now a week after we started she is on a fairly steady sleep cycle. She goes to bed around 9, gets up at 11 to eat, then she sleeps until 6. I'm getting 7 hours of straight sleep people! Can I just tell you how Awesome that is??!!!! I didn't really realize how tired I was until I finally got the sleep I needed.

Every day it just gets better and better. I feel more and more alive and in control. I'm not just going through the motions, or just eeking by. I'm actually making it through the day, getting everything done that needs to be, and having leftover time for somethings I want to do.

It's amazing how much sleep affects all aspects of your life. I am more paitient, more creative, more determined, and definetly more ambitious then I have been since before I got pregnant with Dot. Life is wonderful again.

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Sleep Training

It officially begins tonight. Dot had her four month doctor's appointment today. She's really four and a half months, but with the move and all we got a little bit behind schedule. We've got the doctor's go ahead to slowly cut out the nightly feedings, and hopefully begin the full nights of rest.

We'll see if it works.

I've been trying (with out eliminating feedings) to get her to sleep through the night for the past two months. When I go in her room she nurses, and that's it. I don't make eye contact, I don't rock her, I don't speak. I literally stand over her crib and wait for her to finish. When she's done she gets a binky and I lay her back down. This has helped with getting her back to sleep after she eats. She used to try and stay up to play after the 3 am feeding. So we're definetly headed the right direction.

Now, taking the next step, we're going to start slowly moving back the feedings. Instead of 12:00-2:00-4:00-6:00, we'll push back 12:00 and hopefully just have 1:00-3:00-5:00 for the first week. Then push back the 3:00 leaving us with 1:00-4:00. and continuing until we're making it through the night. The idea is just to condition her stomach to go for longer periods without food at night. We'll still be doing the every two hour thing during the day.

The pediatrician said that if we stick to it she should be sleeping all night in a month, right around the time of my birthday. That would be the best present Dot could give me.

Hopefully it will work. I need it to work. Wish us luck!

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**Well she did it. She pooped. You knew as soon as I blogged about it, and voiced my concern to my doctor she would. And it was perfectly normal, so nothing to worry about.

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Praying for Poop

Dot hasn't pooped in 5 days. I'm worried.

I know that a normal exclusively breastfed baby will go up to 10 days without pooping, but with Googie's history with constipation, I'm just worried.

It's been 5 days. The waiting has begun. The praying for a poopy diaper has started. I truly, sincerely, absolutely, hope that I am wrong . . .

But Dot hasn't pooped for 5 days.

At least we have experience this time. At least it won't take 18 months to get it under control this time. At least my house is already set up to eliminate milk quickly.

But really, let me be wrong. Let her be normal.

Dot, please will you poop?

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I'm still here

I just haven't had much time to myself lately. Dot is four months old and still waking up 3 times a night. Googie has finally hit the terrible twos, and that has it's own set of challenges as you all know. I swear I can't turn my back on her for two seconds! We're looking into buying our first house, and figuring that out takes up any spare time I really have.

Just to catch you up on a couple things:

• Dot has acid reflux/heart burn and is on Zantac (this has really helped with the crying)
• Dot has decided not to sleep through the night anymore
• Googie's hair loss was not caused by lymphoma, leukemia, hyper/hypothyroidism, diabetes, celiacs disease, or any other potentially fatal disease. We're waiting on the test results on a possible dietary deficiency. So far that has all been good news. (I don't know that I ever wrote about this . . . anyway she lost most of her hair on the front/top of her head and my previous doctor dismissed it as stress. My new pediatrician was appalled that the previous doctor didn't run the appropriate tests, so Googie had a bunch of blood work done.)
• Googie's constipation may or may not be caused by milk. The new doctor says that since no milk diet is working to keep it up, but he wants an actual diagnosis from an allergist. So were going to see them in the next month or so.

Those were the big discoveries that we made. Everything else has just basically been ho-hum everyday life. Excitement here and there. But too much to write about here.

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There are times that I just send the tantrum throwing Googie to her room, (for her own safety, and my sanity), but then there are times that she just couldn't be any cuter. Like last night . . .

As I was getting ready to make dinner she comes into the kitchen and says "I nee a hel(p) momma." So I got out an empty bowl and spoon for her. She stirred it for about a minute and then, exasperated, she tells me "Momma, I nee a hel(p) momma!" She wanted to do something that would actually help, so I let her stir the sauce I was making, but when that was done, everything else was too hot for her to help with. So I had her set the table. One plate, one fork, one glass at a time. I would say to her "Here, this one's mommy's fork." "Here's Daddy's glass go put it on the table." And she did. Then when dinner was all ready and we all went to sit down at the table apparently we all sat in the wrong spots. She told us "No Dada, tas Momma's" "Momma, sit, sit, ere." Once we were seated properly she went and took her seat like the queen she is. Then, excited to be in charge she told us to be "quie" and that it was time for a "rayer." We said our prayer, and as soon as we were done she said "ea(t) Momma, ea(t) Dada." We both were trying so hard not to laugh.

She ate more for dinner last night then I have ever seen her eat, and I think it was because she was involved in the whole process. This is something that I am definitely going to encourage. If she wants to help around the house who am I to say no?

Dot on the other hand . . . Well she's adorable during the days. But she is killing me, slowly killing me at night. She's up at least three times a night, and since the girls share a room, Googie is getting up once or twice a night now too. Last night I was up 6 times. SIX! I really don't see the point of even going to sleep sometimes. Dot's four months old now and I think I should at least be getting a couple of full nights of sleep a week. She did it for a couple nights there before we moved, but ever since then it's like yeah right mom. Googie was 3 weeks old when she started sleeping through the night. I just don't know what to do.

I would let Dot cry for 20 minutes, or more, when she wakes up at night, if the girls weren't sharing a room. But I can't have them both awake; and as it is, if Googie wakes up she thinks it's time to get up. I just don't know what to do. I can't wait until we can get into a house and they'll have their own rooms. I wish I could change this pattern but I just don't know how to do it. Any suggestions (and I mean any!) would be appreciated. I am truly at a loss.

So that's my life lately. I'm tired all the time, and busy with Googie, or Dot, or both, the rest. They just never leave me alone! Even now, Googie is playing at my feet and giving me bites of whatever she's concocting in her pots. Kids. Yeah. What more can I say? I can't wait until they grow up. (I know, I know "treasure these moments, they grow up too fast" blah blah blah.) I'm just tired of Toddlers and babies. Actually basically I'm just tired. Okay, now I'm just babbling. I'll stop now. Maybe if I turn on a movie, Googie will let me nap. But probably not. It's no fun to watch a movie by yourself.

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I need a Breather

Seriously.

You want to hear about my night. Oh good, I need to vent to somebody.

First of all. I've held Dot, all night. All NIGHT people. Everytime I put her down she crys. She's crying as we speak, well wait. There she stopped. I'm I wonderful and loving mom, really I am. But when she's cried everytime I put her down, even just to go to the bathroom . . . well, lets just say everybody has their breaking point. (Huh, I thought my ears were getting a break, but alas the crying has begun yet again.)

So that's mostly just a common annoyance, and if that was all I'd be okay. But then there is Googie.

Okay, so the first time was me getting mad because I didn't understand. She comes out of her bedroom saying she has to go pottie. I took her 5 minutes before. 5 minutes. I don't care how small your bladder is you don't have to go again. I put her back in bed (pick up Dot who has been crying, again). 5 minutes later I hear her playing in the hall just out of my sight. So I get up and put her back in bed during protests that she really does need to go pottie (little side note here, if Dot hadn't been crying I probably would have listened to her a little better, but I was slightly distracted). Then the third time I hear her open the door, and I am really mad. Why isn't she staying in bed. When I round the corner she is crouched over, crying and pooping in her pull-up (which, by the way, we had just spoke explicitly about not getting dirty). Poor thing. I cleaned her up and got her back in bed. Of course, through it all Dot is crying.

So I settle Dot down and get her to sleep. I'm holding her, and heaven forbid I should even think about putting her down. Then I hear a crash in the girls room. I have to set Dot down and so commences the crying.

Upon arriving in the room, I find Googie in her closet/playroom. She is stuck in her dolly's playpen, smashed against the wall. So I pick her up and put her back in bed. Then as I go back to shut the closet door I see the box of tissues pulled out all over the floor, toys scattered everywhere, and half of the clothes that I had just put in her drawer not 5 minutes before bedtime, strewn across the room. (Deep breaths everyone, DEEP breaths.)

Honestly, I know it could be worse, and it's not the end of the world. That crying baby soundtrack playing in the background just makes the whole situation unbearable.

Now to go and tend to the still crying offspring.

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The Beetles and Dora

She did it. She Did it. She Did It, YEAH! Lo hicimos, She DID it!

Button is my hero. She's slept through the night for the past 3 days. 10:30 pm to 7:20 am people. Oh yeah, were celebrating today! Mom is getting enough sleep, that means everyone is in a good mood around here. Hurray! Yeah! Wahooo! Hurray! She DID it!

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I love the fall for the pretty spring colors, the crisp air, and the fact that the sun doesn't rise until 7:30 or so (and therefore Googie doesn't realize it's time to wake up until 8:00 or so). I can pull out my sweaters and wear them again, and lets not forget all the delicious foods that gets baked because it's that season, or just because it's cold and you need your comfort food. I love the fall in so many ways.

Then there are all the bugs that seem to find there way into your house. Last year we had ants, spiders, millipedes, I even found a caterpillar under my stove! This year hasn't been so bad, mostly because we now live in a second floor apartment. Until last night . . .

I was sitting at my computer innocently reading blogs, and trying desperately to teach myself and understand css/html. When I hear a creak. Probably just my walls, or a door, things creak when your at home by yourself and the kids are asleep. Then it happened again. And again. Out of the corner of my eye I see this big black spot flying through the air. I turn to look at it and it circles my head. Now I'm thinking we have one huge housefly flying around. It is not a housefly. It stops circling and flies right at my face. I jump up (scream of course), and try to swat it away. Once I finish jumping and flailing my arms about (like 2 minutes later), I look on the ground to see where it landed. It's no where to be found. I turn in circles trying to find it and resisting the urge to jump up on the table and stay there until my husband gets home. Then I see it. It's on the arm my sweater. I knocked that thing off my arm so fast it didn't even see my hand coming. It's only once its on the floor that I actually look at my attacker. It was either a beetle or a cricket, maybe a cross between the two. Black and gross, with legs and antenna, and it flew, so it must have been a beetle. After 2 more minutes of jumping around like a crazed monkey, I manage to calm myself down enough to grab a paper plate and dispose of the thing outside. Usually I kill bugs that dare enter my house and then leave there corpses outside as a message to the other bugs to stay out, but I couldn't do it. Not even to the beetle from hell. It was big enough it would have squirted and been messy, and it looked like it would crack and splinter into a million gross bug-gut pieces.

So I've finished with that bug, sit down at my computer to finish what I was doing. And then I hear the creak again. Oh it freaked me out so bad I have creepy-crawlies running under my skin even as I write about it now. I couldn't sit at my computer for the rest of the night.

We never did find the second beetle, but my husband thinks I was just so freaked out that I heard the sound even when it wasn't there. It took me forever to fall asleep last night, my skin just kept crawling every time anything would brush my skin -- like a stray hair. **Shudder**

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So now, if your like me, you not only have the Dora song stuck in your head, you skin is crawling and you have the desperate urge to swat at any place that so much as tingles.

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Just Stay in Bed, Things Are Better Under the Covers

Most days I love being a mom. Then there are day's like today.

We all woke up this morning to Button's screaming (by the way, Button is the baby's name. She just likes to be swaddled and held so much, I feel like she's a button on my shirt! Not to mention she's just a tiny dot of a thing right now. I love that my girls stay little for so long). Googie woke up and yelled at me through the wall "sissy sad, sissy sad" and then I hear "sissy, sissy, shhhhh, shhhhh, sissy, HEY! Sssissy! SHHHHH!!!!" So I drag myself out of bed, go in their room and realize that it is once again time to feed Button. I feel like I am constantly feeding this girl! Every two hours round the clock, except for one 4 hour period at night. She eats constantly.

I turn on a show for Googie (yeah for Dora!) and sit her down so I can nurse Button. She eats for all of 5 minutes per sitting. Such a stinker. Googie and I get breakfast, and then the fun really starts. I set Button down for two seconds and she starts screaming. I pick her up and she stops. It's going to be one of THOSE days. I pull out the trusty sling, which I feel like I should just adopt as a shirt, I wear the darn thing so much! Get Button all cozied up and force the binky on her.

Now that I have Button all setteled down, it's Googies turn to cry. Her cry is more like a whine.

"Mom read me a book, no not like that. AHHHHH. Mom, why are you runining my life! No I don't want to play with my babies, and to prove it I'll scatter them all over the family room, while I throw myself on the ground. No I don't want to finish my breakfast. How dare you ignore my fit! Look at me while I'm screaming at you! HEY!!!! Owww, now I hit my head on the floor because I threw a fit. Feel sorry for me!!! NOOOO Don't Touch ME!!!! AHHHHHH!!!!!"

At least that's what she would have said if she was about 10 years older, I can't wait to have pre-teen/teenagers. She's taking a nap now. She'd been up for two hours and already I'd had enough and put her back to bed. I know, such a mean mom.

I'm supposed to make rolls to take to a little luncheon today. I'm also supposed to take a shower, do the laundry, and apparently pick up every toy we own, but so far nothing has gotten done. I'm so glad I got out of bed this morning.

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Back to Babies

Okay, I realize I really don't have much room to moan, but this is the internet, and you all have to listen because I say so. Either that or you don't have to read it, but I choose to believe that you do, and that you care, and sympathize, and say everything I want to hear -- Just like any good friend would do.

I am only on my second child and I am SICK of babies. Okay, I should clarify, I'm sick of getting up 3-4 times a night. I'm sick of being tired all day. I'm sick of having boobs that don't work right. I'm tired of babies crying for no apparent reason. I can't stand not having a solid schedule.

On the other hand, I love holding her when she's sleeping, and gazing into the deep brown eyes when they're open. And, um, yeah that's about it. I guess I could say I like her poopy diapers but that wouldn't be completely true. I just like that they don't smell yet. You know, no real food.

I am ready to be done having babies. I'm ready to move on from this stage of my life. I'm ready for kids who speak to me, in real words, not their own language. I just wish it was five years from now, I'd have my 3 kids all over the age of 3 and I'd be done with babies.

I'd still hold someone else’s baby. I'd even watch someone else’s baby. But come night I'd have my bed, and uninterrupted sleep (I really don't want to hear from you mothers with older children that they still wake you up. Just don't say it, okay? I'm falling asleep with my eyes open right now and I just need to believe that someday before they all move out, I will again get a full night sleep).

Our current chapter of babyhood is realizing once again that my left boob will never be nurse-able, pump-able, or ever in any way produce an ounce of milk. It quits working once my milk comes in. Go figure. I even have a hospital grade pump, and I got zilch after 20 minutes today. I've officially given up on it. This inevitably means that I won’t make it to the one year mark yet again before my baby’s weaned. And I will for the next 6-8 months have very, very un-evened sized breasts. I am determined this time to make it to 6 months on an exclusive diet of breast milk. Really a very do-able goal as long as I don't get obsessed about different sized boobs, or self conscious about stuffing a sock in the one side of my bra. Not only is formula annoying and I blame it for Googie's constipation issues, but it's expensive!

And of course to add to my annoyance, we’ve developed Thrush. You all know what that is, and for those of you who haven't had it just imagine itching so bad that it hurts to the point of tears, and then add a strong baby suckle on top of that. It's really not fun. Luckily I have a cool pediatrician who didn't make me come in for an appointment with both my girls, so she could look in my baby's mouth and tell me what I already know. She kindly just called in the prescription.

And just to make my life a living hell, my dear, sweet, cuddly, 2 weeks old today, daughter decided that she wanted to scream for three hours this morning. No reason. No diaper rash, no bug bites, no bubbles, not hungry, she just felt like screaming. Maybe it was the thrush, I don't know. She screamed for three hours straight without letting up. Then I finally got her to eat and it calmed her down enough to get her to sleep for a couple hours. Then she woke up and decided to scream again for an hour this afternoon before crying herself to sleep. So far this evening hasn't been that bad. Hopefully this was a one time thing. I don't think I have the stamina or the patience to deal with a truly colicky child.

I am so ready to be done with babies.

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The Story

The Day Of:

I was scheduled to be induced Tuesday, September 5th at 7:30 AM. My doctor told me to call in at 6:00 AM to make sure they weren't too busy, and if they said to come in, to go right away. We did, and they were. I was told to call back at 8:00 and see. Same thing at 8:00, still to busy, call back at 10:00. Still busy at 10:00, call back at 12:00. Less busy at 12:00, but the shift manager lady who approves people being brought in for inductions was at lunch. Call back at 2:00. By this point, I'm mad, I'm frustrated, I'm ready to not be pregnant anymore, and I feel like they just keep putting me off. I hadn't been able to sleep since 4:00 AM because of the anticipation. And being my emotional self I'd broken down around 10:00 AM and had been crying off and on ever since. So my husband calls my doctors office, explains the situation, and makes me sound like a psycho-hormonal-pregnant lady (which I was, but it was kind of offensive at the moment). So my doctors nurse calls the hospital (where my doctor happens to be) and then calls us back. They had been really busy that morning and we were first on the list to be brought in as soon as they could. That made me feel a little better. A little. Then I got a call at 12:45 PM, from the hospital saying we could come down at 2:00. So I called my pre-set-up baby sitter, who'd been waiting just like us all day to see if she'd be needed, and arranged to drop googie off. Then I got nervous. Why was I so excited to go in today? Did I really want to go through labor?

At the Hospital, Before Birth:

They get me all set up with the registration forms, put an IV in, get the heart monitor on my belly and it's registering around 130/140. So that's a good thing. Maybe the monitor will be able to monitor her and we'll be fine. No special needs and a normal delivery, yeah! Then my doctor comes in. Says he would really be more comfortable with the head monitor. So he breaks my water (by the way, after feeling that, I was so dumb for thinking my water had broken! Wow, I didn't know there was that much fluid in there!) and attaches the little head electrode. Now her heart beat is just off the charts. The sheet that it is printing out looks more like an earth quake seismograph than a heart beat. So my doctor looks at it and gives us our choices again. He says we can go through with the induction, "drive blind," and hope nothing goes seriously wrong, or do the c-section. I mean what choice did we really have? Risk the life of your unborn child, or deal with recovery for 6 weeks. I mean seriously. Is it even a choice? We did a c-section.

In the Delivery Room:

They gave me a Spinal (like an epidural but it numbs all the way up to your chest) and then strapped my legs to the table and put up a screen so I can't see the hole they cut into my stomach. My husband got to be in the room with us. She was born 6 minutes after they started. It was a really interesting sensation. I could feel them pulling at my stomach, and I could feel them pushing on things, but I couldn't feel any pain (well duh, it'd be a pretty bad hospital if I could). They pulled her out and took her over to the heated bed. She took a while turning pink and was on extra oxygen for awhile, but she had a healthy cry so that was reassuring to me. Once they got her pink, they weighed and measured her. Then they took her to the "special care nursery" (that's what they called it, according to my MIL that's the same as the NICU, but whatever) and ran some tests on her heart, including an EKG. I was finished with surgery and back in my room about 4:45 PM. My husband kept running back and forth from the nursery to my room and around 6:30 PM I got to hold my baby for the first time. All the tests checked out and she's going to be okay.

The Recovery

Well so far it hasn't been that bad. She was born on Tuesday and we didn't come home until Friday. But honestly not that bad. They had me on Morphine for awhile at the hospital, and sent me home with some heavy duty drugs, but by Monday night all I needed was a couple of Tylenol. So here we are. 8 days after major abdominal surgery, and I'm walking around, up and down stairs. Completely taking care of myself and our little baby. So the C-section has overall not been that bad. It took me 3 weeks to recover fully from Googie's "normal" birth, and I'm betting it takes about the same with this one. Maybe longer for the incision to heal, but as far as pain and ability to function, in a couple more weeks I'll be 100%!

My Baby Girl

She is a gorgeous baby just like her sister. Sorry, no pictures, or names, I'm still kind of freaked out about the whole internet stalker thing. And we choose fairly unusual names for our girls. I'm still working on a code name for her, for now, she'll just be baby, or my baby, or the baby . . . etc. But I can tell you she is a little angel. She loves to cuddle and she loves to eat. She's up every two hours around the clock. Googie loves her little sister too. She's always wanting to hold her, and give her kisses. I'm always tired these days. But I have my mom here helping for the rest of this week, so I've been taking advantage of that and squeezing in a couple extra naps. Everyone is doing really well and trying to adjust to all the changes that come with a newborn.

Next weeks topic: Sibling rivalry. Why my oldest loves her new sister, but seems to hate me.

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Newest Addition

Our little girl finally arrived!

She was born September 5th, 2006 at 4:01 PM. She weighed a whooping 7 lbs 7 oz and was 19 and 3/4 inches long.

More details to come when I have a spare second away from all our family and friends stopping by to see her.

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